A Prize In Every Box

This is a place for the random musings and life experiences of one Fliven, who looks for life's fun little surprises, even when its in a giant box of stale, tasteless foodstuffs.

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Location: Sugar Hill, GA, United States

The details of my life remain shrouded in mystery.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Classification and Leeks

Today's blog, classifying the metrorail problem rider. I will endeavor to break this down into five simple categories:

1. The Fare Ignorant (cantworka farecardus): This individual, despite the fact that they may have ridden the metro every day of their lives, are brilliant, are in fact a rocket scientist, cannot figure out how to either purchase a farecard, or figure out how much it is from one station to the next, or, most annoyingly, can't operate the access gates. Always ends up being the person right in front of you. Especially when you're in a hurry. Also in this species fall those who try to use farecards they have been saving since the Hoover administration and have recently soaked in chocolate milk. You can locate them by the *splut* sound when they try to stuff their farecard into the access gate bezel. Another subset that are rare to see these days are those who try to pay their fare with odd currency, be it rubles, pesos, doubloons, chickens, or giant stone discs.

2. Yes, We Have No Personal Space (ina yourfaceus): The person who has a tendency to be either big, old, smell weird, high, or some combination of the three, finds it necessary to sit or stand right next to you, even if the car is otherwise completely vacant. Also the person who seems determined to velcro themselves to your clothing on a crowded platform or escalator.

3. The Deaf (loudus obnoxious): Not to be confused with the actual hearing-impaired, who are usually among the best of metro riders, the Deaf are those who need to talk at a decibel level to the person next to them that can be heard three cars away. Also the type who, when they have no one to talk to, will put on their earphones and turn their music up until you can hear it across the car, over the sound of the train, and despite having earphones and music yourself.

4. Fidgeters (cant sitstillus): An otherwise nice, conscientious metro rider, the Fidgeter will sit next to you for your entire commute and constantly fidget. Be it messing with their hair or moving their legs or tapping their fingers or scratching or looking around or all of the above, the one thing they will not do is just sit quietly. A subset of these is the newspaper fidgeters, who are those who get 1, 2, or even 3 different papers, and spend their entire commute opening, flipping pages, reordering sections, creasing, uncreasing, stacking, and shuffling their papers without actually reading any part of them.

5. The Wildcard (augh runforyourlifeus): A category for those who don't fit any other. One to a train, sometimes 1 to a car. Those who seem otherwise normal, but occasionally swat at flies that aren't there and then laugh in a disturbing manner. Or stand up and begin singing hymns in Korean. Or are carrying a brick and a jar of mayonnaise.

Fliven™ and A Prize in Everybox™ are not affiliated with the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority, and this blog does not reflect the opinions of WMATA.

Today's fun, provided by Poppy Girl, is the Leek Song, to be sung when you are happily spinning leeks. Also, the Spinning Leeks is a great name for a band.

Friday, August 18, 2006

One more thing...

Posted a rather grainy picture of Cubicle Paradise below...if you look close you can see my cool yet tempermental G5, the giant musical light-up Darth Vader pez dispenser to the right of my monitor, and the slick goblet I made with our team at a paint-your-own-pottery place.

My business...is DONE!

After a hellish past couple of weeks—working 70+ hours a week, working nights, weekends, holidays—the big push is over! Had to create meeting materials in the neighborhood of 350 pages from scratch for a two-day meeting. Now I can sit back, relax, and laugh at all the other unfortunate designers who are still prepping for their meetings. Not really, I had help and will help others in the coming weeks. We will defeat evil with the sword of teamwork and the hammer of not bickering.

This week has been stellar for other reasons, as well. Finally got Animaniacs Volume 1 on DVD. Hours of slapstick cartoon goodness there. And the flashlight I ordered should ship tomorrow! For those who are not flashlight nerds, I ordered the M6 Guardian flashlight from Surefire. This is a military-made, aircraft-grade aluminum encased, 500-lumen shining piece of coolness. Look it up online if you want to know more. If you get the infrared filter attachment, yes, you can signal satellites. Which I plan on doing. Sending messages like "stop looking at me!" and "hey, I found Waldo!" and so on. Its normally really ridiculously expensive, but I had a coupon.

And I'm going to the beach tomorrow! It seems like ages since I've been to the beach. Its actually only been 2 years. Which is still a long time to go without beachy fun.

Today's fun: Make Your Own Jackson Pollock Painting! (click your mouse button to change colors)

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Busy week...

My program's executive retreat is a week from Tuesday, which means that yes, I have to prepare all manner of meeting binders and appendix materials CDs. They've kept me pretty busy the last couple weeks, and will for another...11 days. Ugh. The good news is that I have a sabbadical at the beach planned for the weekend right after that. I plan to stay indoors the entire time and work on my pale (as opposed to being outside, working on my tan). Ha, not really! I'll go out and do some beachy fun. Although if its as hot there as it is here now, maybe not...

And now, for your entertainment, the 10 songs I just downloaded from iTunes:
Ghostbusters Theme by Ray Parker Jr.
The Warrior by Scandal
Don't Stop Believin' by Journey
Give a Little Bit by Supertramp
Light of a Fading Star by Flogging Molly
November Rain by Guns N' Roses
Apache by The Sugarhill Gang
Afterhours by Covenant
The Celts by Enya
We Like to Party by the VengaBoys

My music mix is the greatest in the land! You are all jealous! ;)