A Prize In Every Box

This is a place for the random musings and life experiences of one Fliven, who looks for life's fun little surprises, even when its in a giant box of stale, tasteless foodstuffs.

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Location: Sugar Hill, GA, United States

The details of my life remain shrouded in mystery.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Not in the Face!

So yesterday, we discovered that the downstairs bathroom was locked. With no one inside it. This is a major bummer, right? So I grab a screwdriver and a hammer and pull the pins out of the hinges. Foolish me expected the door to pop right off. It did not. Instead, it stuck fast, until I crouched down, got my fingers under the bottom edge, and yanked with all my might. Then it not so much popped off as EXPLODED off. Knocked me on my butt, and I got a face-full of metal hinge. It didn't really hurt a whole lot, but my nose suddenly started gushing blood from between my eyes. Not good. After leaving a bloody trail all the way to the kitchen sink, I get it stanched and then view the damage. Cut across the entire bridge, and the flesh of my nose is trying to slide off my face. Not good. So, as gently as possible, I inform the wife, and we go to the ER. The finance lady reminds me of Elliott Reed from Scrubs, and the actual doctor reminds me of the wife's friend C. In fact, everyone there reminded me of someone else. Weird.

I gotta tell you, anesthetic has made wonderful progress in the last 25 years since I had another face-smashing snafu. At that time, it was injections with a freaky big scary needle right into your face. And now? Swab some stuff on with a q-tip and wait 20 minutes. SO much better!

So yeah. 5 stitches in my face, and I can't be too facially expressive for awhile. Kinda ruined the Sunday afternoon.

Also, had to spend a hundred bucks on a new car tire cause those dummies couldn't patch a hole. That's a trifle irritating.


Anonymous Jennifer said...

That sounds horrible! May I suggest that you explore (or perhaps you did already?) the option for simply removing the door knob? We've had the "unexplained locking" issue several times now. Sometimes it's as easy as poking a paper clip into the lock, but sometimes we've also had to resort to using a teensy screwdriver to actually turn the lock from the other side. It's a HUGE pain in the neck, but better than a pain in the nose.

10:15 AM, October 24, 2011  

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